Big Brother 16 Final Thoughts

The most deserving person won Big Brother, Derrick played a pretty flawless game right from the jump, he was never on the block, he won competitions when he needed too and he pretty much controlled everything that happened in the house.  He may not have played the most exciting game, but he played one of the best games in recent memory and very much deserves the $500K.  All that being said if Cody wasn't such a fucking cement head his whole season would have been for naught.  Cody's loyalty to Derrick and The Hitmen cost him $450,000, when Cody won the last HOH I thought for sure that Cody was going to pull a Jon from BBCAN2 and Derrick was going to get Neda'd... Jon and Neda were banging for christs sakes and he still stabbed her in the back for the win.  ANYONE would have won sitting next to Victoria, Cody should've known that, he is going to be kicking himself in the ass over that one....

The only thing that was shocking is that unlike 90% of the votes this year, this wasn't unanimous.  Bitter juries can fuck off....what was that whack job Jocasta blabbing on about with fake praying??  I don't remember that, and as much as I love my boy Donny he was still bitter about the whole Skittles thing, nobody in their right mind would possibly think that fucking Cody played a better game than Derrick.

This moment was the best of the finale though, the look on shitty Frankies face when my beloved Julie Chen not only revealed that he didn't win America's Favourite Player, but that he wasn't even in the Top 3!  So much for unleashing your "millions of followers" you fucking tool.  I am very happy Donny won America's Favourite Player, knowing ol' Donny I think he is happier knowing he was voted as AFP than he is winning the $25K.

The good news is Big Brother has been renewed for another 2 summers, so you can all look forward to be bitching about BB17 and BB18!! I really hope they do a full All-Stars season, but I read an interview with Julie Chen saying that it is not likely to happen.  Hopefully in the next couple of seasons they just don't jam these stupid game twists down our throats.  Team America was easily the worst twist ever, never ever do that again..  If they insist on doing twists (which they will) I suggest they bring it in a few weeks into the season once everyone is comfortable and alliances have been formed.  How much more interesting would the whole dual HOH/Battle of the Blocks have been if the two HOHs weren't always working together and were on opposite sides of the house?? Thinking back on the last few seasons it would be so much better if the show be given a chance to gel before they had MVP twists or Sabateurs etc. but they're the producers making the big bucks and I am sitting here behind my computer in my underwear making snarky comments.

Well that's it for my blogging on another season of Big Brother, thank you for reading, and I really do appreciate the kind words that people leave on Facebook etc. I hope you've enjoyed reading these as much as I have writing them!  I am going to be trying out for Big Brother Canada 3, so I may not be writing about BBCAN3!! There is pretty much no chance I'll make it, so I'll be writing posts about that season when it starts up next March.  In the meantime I'll post my usual food reviews (I am always taking recommendations, anywhere in Hamilton, Toronto or London!) I might post something about the Leafs, or something else sports related.  Until then give me a follow on the Twitter @HDH2112

Big Brother 16 Week 12 Thoughts

Thank fuck this self-absorbed egomaniac is off my TV.  I honestly think I haven't hated a Big Brother contestant more than I have hated Frankie, and I am so happy that he isn't going to get the satisfaction of winning $500K for his "charity".  He went out claiming how loyal he was, where was his loyalty to Zach?? To Donny?  I'm disappointed they let him know before they evicted him, an actual blindside would've been beautiful.  Good on Caleb and Cody for calling him out on his bullshit, he really did think he was Jesus of the house, and what the fuck was he thinking saying he is going to unleash his "millions of followers" on them.  How so? From the Jury House where you are still cut off from the outside world?  The worst part is that he didn't get the Christine-like booing he deserved because the Tuesday eviction show was pre-taped and not live, so the audience was all CBS employees because they didn't want spoilers to get out (they got out anyways).  He is such a conceited fuck, and from what I have read recently his shitty sister is a conceited diva as well.  Unfortunately he will have his enablers and ball washers surrounding him when he gets out who will all tell him how marvelous he is.  Now there is the matter of America's Favourite Player:

Give me a fucking break.  Fuck this awful family, they are worse than the O'Doyles in Billy Madison.  There is a massive difference when you have 173K twitter followers and your awful daughter has a whopping 18.7 million followers... how many twitter followers does Donny's hillbilly family have?? Anyways, just like fucking Elissa last year who came in the house with an established fan base and won AFP, shitty Frankie will win it too.  I really hope Donny wins it though. 

Oh yeah, Caleb was evicted too.  Surprisingly Caleb grew on me this season, especially once Amber was evicted.  Don't you think it was kind of funny that Caleb's ultimate demise came from promoting a TV show called "Stalker."  The waters don't run deep with this fella, good lord he's as dumb as a box of hammers.  He ended up providing most the entertainment the last few weeks, but unfortunately his loyalty ended up being his downfall - loyalty is a great trait to have in real life, but not in Big Brother.  He genuinely does think that Hollywood producers are going to be blowing up his phone wanting him to be the next big Action star.  Caleb throwing shade at Frankie during his interview with Julie Chen was the highlight of his season, Frankie did make it all about him, and I am glad people in the house realized that.

Other Random Thoughts:

I liked seeing the jury back in the house destroying everything, like I said last week I am way more interested in seeing them then the actual remaining houseguests.

Derrick is still the heavy favourite to win, (I called it a long time ago too!)  By the way I liked how the Narc just so happened to pick "420" for his number when he won the HOH.  The only way he loses if Cody pulls a Jon from BBCAN2 and stabs Derrick in the back at the end and takes worthless Victoria to the final 2.

Julie Chen got quite pissy during the HOH contest on Tuesday, I love when that happens.

For next year and beyond, if they are going to returning guests make them all returning guests, if it is going to be C, D or E-List celebrities or siblings of former players, celebs etc. make it an entire house of those people enough with the mixing of them, and for christs sakes make it all real fans of the show, not fucking recruits who have never seen an episode.  Apparently 2/3rds of the houseguests were recruited to be on the show.... even fucking Victoria.  How in the blue hell did they recruit HER to be on the show??  

Only two episodes left thank fuck.  As much as I love the show, the first couple of weeks and the last couple of weeks are usually dreadful.

Big Brother 16 Week 11 Thoughts

Ummm... there really isn't a piss of a lot to say this week because of the BB Rewind.  So here is an artist's rendering of Christine.  In a move that surprised nobody, they decided to play it safe and eliminate Victoria.  Which they will likely do again next week, because this house is allergic to making big moves. Unfortunately there was no big reveal to Victoria that they are in an alliance like when the best alliance in Big Brother history - The Brigade spilled the beans to Brittany.  I really miss that season, the Brigade with the best houseguest ever Enzo, Brittany was hilarious and also gorgeous, there was the overwhelming hate we all had for Brenchal, there was when Ragan had that huge and hilarious fight with Rachel when she came back in the house for 24 hours.  Maybe one day we'll get a good season again?? 

Honestly the best part of the week was the part when they showed the Jury House.  Donny's reaction when Christine told them she got booed unmercifully was the best.  They'd be better off filming the Jury House and airing what is going on there instead of the bullshit that is going on in the real house.  In a way I kind of feel bad for Christine, she got booed on national television, nobody likes her in the jury house, she could well be served with divorce papers when she gets home.  It's not like she has a great job to go back home too, doesn't she work at Starbucks??  At least Aaryn the Aryan got work with the Westboro Baptist Church, the KKK and Fox News when she got out of the house.

Other Random Thoughts:

Spoilers at the end.  Next week should be a lot better considering there is two evictions.

I still hate Frankie, but I have to begrudgingly give him credit for winning competitions and playing a decent game.  If he makes it to the Final 2 with anyone besides Derrick he will probably win and unfortunately does kind of deserve it.  Let's hope it doesn't happen because he is so incredibly fucking annoying.

Has there been a worst houseguest than Victoria??  Seriously how was she cast to be on the show?  She has absolutely no personality, she is completely dreadful at competitions and she thinks she is some sort of Warrior Princess?  You're no fucking Xena I'll tell you that much.  Seriously she was absent from any screen time at the start of the season because she offered nothing, and now she is clearly being fed her Diary Room lines by the producers, saying she is a force to be reckoned with and a competition princess... she won one fucking veto competition by default.  She can't even deliver those lines well, she always moves her head from side to side, I am expecting a sassy "Oh No You Di-Ent" at any minute. 

Can Jeff and Jordan please go away forever?  That whole proposal thing was so unbelievably awful, and who in the flying fuck is Brett Eldridge? You guys were on Big Brother 5 years ago move on, do something else with your lives.  Jeff is a fucking tool, his interviews he does with the houseguests are absolutely awful, you might as well have crash test dummy or Victoria do them.

I have to say that Globals episode stream on their website the next day is brutal.  Sometimes it takes forever for them to upload the video, then the video is all jumpy like I am watching some Japanese cartoon and I am about to have a seizure.  Worst of all the commercials (which are the same ones each god damned time) are about 15 times louder than the video.  I have to have max volume just to hear anything during the show and all the sudden it is commercial time and my ear drums burst into flames.

Caleb needs to stop saying dag gum.  Does he even have his Grade 10?

Caleb won HOH.  Which means he is going to be a blindly loyal to his boys and put up Victoria.  Who he puts up beside her is the bigger question.  It could well be Derrick because he has not been on the block yet, and it is "his turn" and Caleb seems closer to Frankie than to Derrick.  If Frankie was smart he would then make moves to get Derrick out of the house, but I don't see that happening.  Victoria will be gone on Tuesday and hopefully Frankie on Wednesday.

Big Brother 16 Week 10 Thoughts

Can we just give Derrick the $500K now and spare us the last two weeks of this bullshit?  This season of Big Brother has quickly degenerated into one of the most predictable, boring seasons yet.  Every single fucking eviction has been an unanimous vote, nobody has the calzones to make a big move, instead "going with the house" and "not wanting to get blood on their hands" has won the day. Fuck Off.  Like Nicole said you're not playing Big Baby you're playing Big Brother.  Obviously the Froot Loop Dingus Nicole was the first one out tonight, her coming back into the game is bullshit to begin with, and she was targeted right off the bat.  So good bye Nicole, have fun with Hayden in the jury house. 

Being Double Eviction night I was hoping that Frankie was going to be next to go, in the little pow-wow's Derrick held (PS Derrick looked pretty pissed off that he won HOH) it sounded like the plan was to back door Frankie, so obviously that little turd goes out and wins the Veto.  I let out an audible FUCK!! when that happened.  So in yet another predictable move, the wretched Christine was shown the door... not only did she burst out the door without saying good bye to anyone she was unmercifully booed back to the stone age!  Aaryn the Aryan didn't even get that much boo's last season and she was genuinely reprehensible, to me it sounded like it was just one guy doing the majority of the booing but it's not like the rest of the audience was clapping either.  Christine talked A LOT of shit on the live-feeds (not just current house guests, but past house guests), she was instrumental in getting fan-favourite Donny out, plus she had that whole weird touchy-feely relationship with Cody, that rubbed everyone the wrong way.  The houseguests obviously heard all the boo's, as soon as the feeds came back on I read on Twitter that Frankie said she was talking shit about HIM in the Diary Rooms and that is why she got booed.  Jesus Jumped Up Christ he is a self-centred piece of shit, the boo's better RAIN DOWN on him when he is finally mercifully evicted from this god forsaken house.

Great now we have this fucking thing, the "BB Rewind" as far as I can see this is just a desperate ploy by the producers to breathe a little bit of life in this dull season.  I've read that ratings have taken a real nose dive in the last couple of weeks.... most likely because Frankie is a vile cretin.  The 6 or 7 loyal readers of my Big Brother blogs (Thank you for reading by the way!!) all know that I despise twists, but if Frankie wins HOH and this ends up fucking him over than I am all for it, if it somehow helps Frankie I am going to shit bricks.  Knowing these jackasses none of them are going to press the button because they want to play its safe and not want to get any blood on their hands.

Other Random Thoughts

THIS IS IMPORTANT: Remember last week when I said the CBS is going to start airing Thursday Night Football as of September 11?  I read tonight that for the next two weeks Big Brother will be on Sunday, Tuesday and Wednesday... I am not sure if that is the same in Canada, or if that is just an American thing, but I am sure Global will air it at the same time as they do in Murrica.

EDIT :  It's been pointed out to me that my beloved Julie Chen did make this abundantly clear tonight, I might have flipped to the Blue Jays game or was looking on Twitter when this happened!!

I read spoilers, and maybe that is why I have found everything so fucking boring recently.  The HOH, nominations, and veto are all done by Sunday, so I knew then Caleb was a fucking wuss and did not back-door Frankie and went the safe route by putting up Victoria as the replacement nomination.  All I could do during the Wednesday episode is shake my head and give the middle finger to my TV.  I can't help but read spoilers though, I am such a Nosey Parker, I totally snooped for Christmas presents when I was a kid.

Can we ban Frankie from hosting competitions?  He is so fucking annoying, he really is in for a rude awakening when he is out of the house as can be seen here:

Joker's Updates does a poll on the houseguests popularity and Frankie has overwhelmingly been in last place for weeks, but I am sure he thinks that everyone still loves him.  I make notes on my phone throughout the week for this blog (nerd alert I know), 90% of my notes are either "Fuck Frankie" "I hate Frankie" or "Frankie is a steaming pile of shit".  Fuck Ariana Grande as well, her name sounds like some pretentious fucking Starbucks order.  I knew this night wouldn't end well when she Bleeding Gums Murphy'd her way through the Star Spangled Banner before the Packers-Seahawks game.

Team America is still a thing?  Good fucking lord, enough is enough, when are they going to realize how much of a flop this is.

Derrick is obviously going to win and should win, but he is going about it in the most boring way possible.  He has controlled the entire season, good for him, but bad for the viewers!  That being said I like his strategy, he's there to win $500K for his family, not to entertain the masses.

Victoria has played the perfect second place game.  She is completely useless so of course she is going to be strung along in the end.  Not a bad way to earn $50K for a summer of doing nothing.  The 4 remaining guys would be absolutely stupid not to take her to Final 2.

Cody isn't the only dinosaur that has been in the Big Brother house, remember Jerry from Big Brother 10?

JUDAS!!!!!!!!

EDIT: I found out HOH spoilers, so read them after this.  I'll leave this paragraph in anyways though.

As for what happens next week, well it'll be either Caleb, Cody or Frankie that will win HOH, as Derrick can't play and Victoria doesn't have a fucking clue.  I can only hope that Cody wins as he seems to be the most gung-ho about getting Frankie out.  Caleb is too loyal to his Bomb Squad (which doesn't actually exist), which he thinks he is the leader of (which he never was, Ninja Turtle Devin was), and he would push for Victoria to leave, I can see his Army background being the root of that, being loyal in combat and outside the Big Brother house is a great quality, but this is a game, get the fucking knives out and stab someone in the back.  Plus there is this retarded Rewind thing.  As long as it is Frankie walking out the door I'll be happy.

Uhhhh, so you can forget that whole last paragraph.  But anyways, fucking shitty god damned Frankie won the HOH..... BUT!  They pushed that stupid button, so his whole HOH week will be all for not!! I can't wait to see the look on that little weasel's face when Julie Chen tells him his HOH meant nothing.  But with our luck this season they'll re-do everything and fucking Frankie will win HOH again.  Booooooo.