Remember when I said I was going to post my sports ramblings on Sunday because Monday I was too busy being gainfully employed... yeah well nevermind about that. Back to sweet unemployment bliss for your boy. You want Squids?? Take a look at the store manager and customers of SMART Choice Rent to Own, charging low income East End Squids $3000 for a shitty used couch and $1400 for a god damned PS4 after the ridiculous fees. Part of my job was putting shit on KIJIJI would you pay $300 for this piece of shit chair?? (Keep in mind the arms and legs are all scuffed to shit) It's going to take me weeks to clean off the ink from their be-mulleted tentacles. Ugh.
The big sports story of the week was your boy HDH and his buds invading Auburn Hills Michigan to watch the Raptors lose a heartbreaker to the Shitstons.
The Curse of HDH continues.
I've seen the Blue Jays play in New York City and Pittsburgh and they've lost, I saw the Ti-Cats at SkyDome last year and they lost, and now I've witnessed the Raptors lose in Detroit. I am going to Cleveland to see the Jays for 2 games this May, I hope to fuck my curse does not continue.
Anyways, the Palace of Auburn Hills, despite being one of the older arenas in the NBA is still a decent spot to watch a game. It's one main concourse like Copps Coliseum, and the bathrooms are a little on the little small side, but other than that they've obviously put some work in to make it up to modern snuff, including a massive Dallas Stadium like scoreboard.
The main shitty thing is that it followed the White Flight out of Detroit and is pretty much in the middle of fucking nowhere. I am a big fan of downtown arenas, I know people bitch about the SkyDome, but it's in a perfect location. The Palace is a good 40-45 minutes away from the border crossing, it's like if the Raptors played in Hamilton for christs sakes... but not just Hamilton, fucking shitty assed Flamborough surrounded by nothing. Luckily we had a chauffeur who hung out at a friends place while we all drank massive amounts of beer.
Speaking of concessions, I thought the selection at the Palace was very good, I got a delicious spicy chicken sandwich, and my friends got some very good looking burgers. There was a great selection of decently priced food beyond the typical hot dogs and popcorn. Unlike the SkyDome the beer selection was great, you could get all kind of craft beers and they don't charge you out the ass. $9.75 US for a massive can of Miller Lite was my go-to however.
Our seats were pretty awesome and Raptors fans easily outnumbered Pistons fans (both were outnumbered by vast swathes of empty seats). There's my boy the White Mamba, I got mad props from strangers for my Tyler Hansbrough shirsey. The game itself was alright, the Raptors started with their disturbing trend of playing down to shitty competition at the start as the Pistons led for most of the first half. DeMar DeRozan put the team on his back and they came roaring back in the second half. Kyle Lowry left with a back injury in the first quarter and he is STILL out, and may not be back until Game 1 of the playoffs *single tear*. As for the ending that brings us to this weeks....
Lou Williams.
C'Mon Bud.
Yeah you're likely to be the 6th Man of the Year, and truth be told you've been pretty fucking good this season. But c'mon bud some of the brain cramps, especially the one you had on Tuesday was down right terrible and cost us the game. Basically the Raptors got the ball back down by 2 with 20 or so seconds left, and Lou ran his stupid fucking is-Lou-ation play, then chucked up a 3 ball with his fucking foot still on the Pistons logo at half court with 5 seconds left, of course he missed. Yeah if he managed to hit that home run ball we would've been the hero, but fuck bud that was a low percentage shot and he didn't even try to run a play! Dwane Casey said in hindsight he should've called a time out and drawn up a play... ya think?!?!?
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Well the Raptors won their division for the second year in the row after being in first for the entire season, they are in the playoffs and are poised to have their best season on paper in team history. If you knew all that going into the season you'd be thrilled right?
Not the fucking garbage clowns to pollute the Toronto sports landscape.
Jesus Christ is nothing good enough for these squids? Yeah the Raps haven't been exactly world beaters since the calendar flipped to 2015 but look at the big fucking picture for Christs Sake. Remember the state of this team even at the start of last season pre-Rudy Gay trade? The Bargnani years? Pretty much the whole 20 years of this fucking franchise.
Look on the bright side of life for once in your miserable existence.
Yeah the Raptors won't win the title this year, I maintain best case Ontario is if they get hot and make the East Finals. It's a god damned work in process still, and that's why "In Masai I trust" he's an exceptional GM and this team is only going to get better and better and within a couple of seasons they will be perennial title contenders, we just got to deal with some growing pains until then.
The Week Ahead: vs. Houston (3/30), @ Minnesota (4/1), @ Brooklyn (4/3), vs. Boston (4/4). The Rockets destroyed us in Houston already once this year and it will take a huge effort by the Raptors not to let it happen again. Then the schedule looks pretty light, in fact it's pretty light for the rest of the season, yeah the are still NBA teams and anything can happen, but hopefully this schedule will give them some much needed momentum heading into the playoffs.
There really isn't much to say right now about the Blue Jays except that I am sick of Spring Training, sick of cold weather and want my beloved Blue Jays back on my TV every night. I've caught a few Spring Training games on TV, and it's great to hear Buck and Tabby again, but Spring Training is so fucking ghetto, the stadiums are shit, they all have to wear these whacky uniforms and caps, and it's a bunch of AA and AAA plugs we'll never see again.
Luckily it's only 1 week until the Jays kick off their season at Yankee Stadium against the god forsaken Yankees. Now that I have a lot of free time on my hands again look for a complete season preview in the coming days!
There is multiple Squids of the Week again this week. These have to go to the keyboard warrior trolling scum bags who used a dying kids last wish to make fun of the Leafs. This poor little kid Garrett Gamble has a rare disease and doesn't have much time left and through the Make a Wish foundation the Maple Leafs signed him to a one day contract, gave him his own bio page on their website, he got to meet the team and hang out in the locker room, and drop the puck at centre ice on Saturday night. Obviously it was the best day of his life. Of course the Leafs posted this on their Facebook page.
Don't ever read the comments on Facebook, YouTube or anything... comment sections should be deleted from everything.
I clicked on the comments, and what should I see but fucking idiots going "duhhhh he's already better than Phaneuf" and saying he'll be long gone before they make the playoffs again. Go fuck yourselves, your souls are dog shit. Same thing happened with the Leafs had a contest to marry a couple of diehard fans at centre ice, same assholesmaking shitty comments trolling the Leafs and their fans when they are trying to do something nice.
Now I have been guilty of telling some pretty dark jokes in my day, but making fun of a dying kids love for the Leafs is going way too far. Good thing for Garrett is the Leafs beat the fucking Senators that night and his favourite player Tyler Bozak got a hatty. Yeah the Leafs have been nothing short a flaming heap of garbage this year, but at least they are finally reaching out and doing nice things for their long-suffering fans.
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